Live Your Faith

Yesterday was a very exciting day for me....maybe for some others in our family too, but all I can account for on here are my emotions and those alone. We had our ultrasound yesterday and we found out (without 100% accuracy as ultrasounds don't guarantee gender) that we are having a little GIRL. Yes...a girl! A baby girl, girl, girl. I was so emotional over this exciting news, I couldn't call enough people or smile any bigger. Tears of joy ran out of the corner of my eyes as I thanked God first and foremost. And with that I have a "God story" for you....

I hear God "speaking" to me often...usually it is when I am getting ready in the mornings, in our bathroom. A couple of months ago, early on in the pregnancy, I was in the shower and God told me "I will give you a girl." He keeps His messages to me pretty short and sweet, unless that is all I am able to "hear" at this time in my life. It took me a while to process this, and as with all things in a pregnancy, everyone seems to guess what you are having and I really felt like I was having a boy...except for this one message that I "heard" the one day. I told Wes about it a few weeks later, and remember asking him...well who else would tell me this? Who else but God? Who else meets me in the morning like this, in the shower, as I sing/hum worship songs and often pray as I wash my hair? But, I kept on telling peopole that I thought this baby was a boy...because part of me didn't want to feel diappointed if it was a boy. (We already have three wonderful boys) I know how I felt when we found out that Asher was a boy, and it took me time to deal with the fact that I wasn't going to have the little girl I so longed for. I didn't want to feel sad again. I was preparing myself mentally for a boy, just in case. Then, earlier on this week, on Monday I think it was...God met me in the morning again and I heard "just trust me." Well now this really got me thinking...but I still wasn't able to 100% trust what I was "hearing" because I was scared. And now, as we found out yesterday...God was speaking to me all along...He was telling me what I longed to know, what my heart desired so deeply...that we would have a baby girl in our family.

So, now I feel a bit foolish...I was even scared to tell anyone about what I heard (except Wes) because what if what I was hearing was wrong? Did I put those little thoughts in my head? What if I was just making stuff up to make me think a certain way?? Why did I doubt the word of God? How do I not do that again? Why can't it be easier to "hear" Him? I can't put a fleece out like Gideon (Judges 6)and command God to show me certain things to prove to me that He is real, and that His word and His love are real. I need to live my faith and trust fully in His word, His plan, and His love.

Wow...isn't He amazing?